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Email etiquette
Has the art of a beautifully-crafted letter gone the way of Betamax and the Bubblecar? Neil Davey takes a wry look at modern mass miscommunication
When letters were the only method of communication, much care and attention was taken. Great poetry was contained therein. Messages of love were often so beautiful that many have been preserved for posterity. Great ideas were exchanged. Rules were obeyed.
And now we have email. Great YouTube clips are contained therein. Messages of love are so graphic they'll have you before a disciplinary hearing before you can reboot. Great chain-letters are forwarded. Rules don't appear to even exist.
At school, we were all taught the basics of letter writing. How to structure them, how to address people - all the little rules that kept a sense of order to proceedings. Somehow, though, a whole new technology has sprung up and etiquette is struggling to catch up. Perhaps it's time we laid down a few ground rules.
They don't even have to be extensive. A good place to start would be DON'T SHOUT! Your keyboard has something called 'Caps Lock'. Make sure it's off, otherwise you'll constantly come across as the world's angriest correspondent.
On the subject of angry correspondents, part of the email issue is its instant delivery. Someone or something's annoyed you? Then complain. A couple of years ago, that would involve finding a pen, a piece of paper and a stamp. By the time you actually sat down to raise the issue, you'd probably have calmed down a little. You might even have second thoughts whether the problem was even worth mentioning. If you did, you were perhaps constructive and relaxed and followed certain rules regarding diplomacy.
Now though, you can get typing while your temples are still throbbing, which frequently leads to "Keyboard Tourette's", the use of language that you'd never dream of using face-to-face. Or, indeed, put in a letter. Yet, because you can click 'send' while the blood's still racing, people do. It's almost acceptable to hit people in this manner. But ask yourself, what would you respond to more? A calmly-worded expression of dissatisfaction? Or a tirade of profanity that would burn Bernard Manning's eyebrows off? Here's a simple suggestion, then: when writing an angry email, delete the address. Then add it at the end. You'd be amazed how often that gives you time to cool off.
The other extreme though is the jokey approach! And the overuse of exclamation marks!!! This - like writing in txt spk - will: a) make you look like an illiterate teenager; and b) make people want to kill you. They will be justified. Nobody, except a labrador puppy or a CBBC presenter is that excitable. Does the same rule apply to question marks??? Or combinations of the two in vaguely dodgy comments?!?! Yes. It does.
Humour, basically, does not come across in emails, so unless your passport says your name is Woody Allen it's probably best left to the professionals. As for sarcasm? Oh yeah, that's also really effective…
Basically, many of the old rules also apply to emails. Keep it concise and polite. Get to the point quickly. Indeed, where possible, get the main point across in the subject box. Re-read the important messages before you send them. And when was the last time you put 'Dear whoever' in an email? Address people by name and you'll be remembered for it. Frankly you won't go far wrong if you just think of an email as a letter - just one that doesn't cost the price of a cup of tea to send and will actually get there on time.
Reader comments
I tend to write e-mails more as if holding a converation, or telephone call, starting with Hello or Hi, not Dear So & So. By the way, nothing makes me angry!!!!!!
Posted by: bernard lyne | 30/12/2008 16:17:13
I note one comment made was (splitting an infinitive!) I'm 76 years of age and I don't what it is and I've managed to write letters and emails for years without getting people angry. I think those that get angry about something as petty as spelling and grammar mistakes are fortunate not to have the real worries that most of us have in life. ENOUGH SAID>
Posted by: Thomas | 03/12/2008 10:20:18
I wrote in capitals for YEARS ever since not being able to read my 6th form scribblings. Then about 235 years later it suddenly became unfashionable to write in capitals because it was used by some to imply shouting. UTTER NONSENSE...
Posted by: drjones | 01/12/2008 20:42:23
Greetings, never send an angry message after a good meal with an over indulgence of wine. I guarantee you will regret it the next day - I know. Cheers.
Posted by: norogis | 01/12/2008 12:54:09
I also find the use of coloured or large fonts to make a point, to me this is the same or worse than "shouting" in capitals. I recently received an email where one whole line was in red in a font several sizes larger than the rest of the mail, it made me very angry
Posted by: mike sanders | 19/11/2008 03:46:31
I think pleasantries and politeness go a long way to smoothing ruffled feathers. It so easy to come across as peremptory when you address someone without putting 'Dear' or 'Hi' first.
Posted by: indigo rose | 28/04/2008 14:07:02
Oh, yes, and we should also apply the basic rules of English grammar. When I was at school, for instance, we were punished for splitting an infinitive!
Posted by: John Oswald | 27/04/2008 15:44:58
In paragraph four we are advised "DON'T SHOUT" It then continues by saying that we should use the 'caps lock'???. I AM USING IT NOW. I THINK THAT THE ADVICE HAS MADE ME ANGRY BUT NOT TO THE TOURETTES STANDARD. I have calmed down now. Can't promise that I will not use 'caps lock'again when I reply to an objurgatory letter that I have received recently from a solicitor!!!!
Posted by: Alexander Fernandez | 25/04/2008 18:21:19
This is so true. I just wish you would provide a simple way to forward articles to friends. Such a facility would not do you any harm and would provide promotional advertising for Saga.
Posted by: Brian Bunclark | 24/04/2008 19:25:48
