Adele Parks: "It's never what's best for one of us"
The novelist on building a happy blended family, giving up alcohol and the simple rule that's shaped her marriage for 22 years.
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The novelist on building a happy blended family, giving up alcohol and the simple rule that's shaped her marriage for 22 years.
My husband Jim and I have been married for 22 years. It’s my second marriage; I was with someone else for eight years, married for five of those, and I had a little baby when we split up. I think the secret of my relationship now is being aware of how it could go wrong and never taking it for granted.
Jim and I have always prioritised what works for us as a team – Jim, me and my son Conrad. It’s never what’s best for one of us but for Team Parks.
After we’d been married for three years, Jim – whose surname was Pride – changed his name to Parks. He did that because he said, "Two-thirds of the family is already called Parks, so it makes sense".
Conrad has a beautiful relationship with his dad, who has two more children with his second wife, and we all get on well. For Conrad’s 25th birthday, there was a great big party with everyone there.
We’ve all done what was right for the three kids, and that’s everybody getting on, buying Christmas presents and being comfortable around each other. For instance, when I saw a dress I knew would be perfect for my ex-husband’s wife, I sent her a link and said: "You’ll look amazing in this".
I dreamed of being a writer as a child but I originally worked in advertising. I was often on an aeroplane or in a hotel on my own and I can’t bear dead time. So I began writing whenever I had the chance and learned the discipline of using every spare moment.
Being awarded an MBE for services to literature in 2022 was the biggest surprise of my life. For about 20 years I’d been working with the National Literacy Trust and The Reading Agency.
This year I’m backing the National Year of Reading campaign to recruit 100,000 new volunteers – it could be as simple as going to a local school to listen to children reading.
Getting into yoga in my fifties has been a lovely surprise. I tried it when I was 50 thinking it wouldn’t be for me, but it’s great for strength, breathing and muscle tone.
I also walk a lot. We did a walk the other day and it accidentally ended up being 19.7 miles. I was quite chirpy at the end, although Jim, bless him, was broken.
I gave up alcohol last August, not because I drank excessively, but even after a glass or two of wine I’d be forgetful and feel heavy the next day. I’m happier without it, sleep better, get up fresher and my skin looks better.
Jim never drank, so now we’re playing a lot more Scrabble late into the night because I’m not dozing off.
In August, I’ll be publishing my 26th novel, Eyes on You. It’s totally different from the light, bright books I wrote 26 years ago – much darker, with more twists and reveals.
The people who read my books want gripping crime fiction and psychological thrillers at the moment.
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