The best foods to get you in the mood - and why they're different for men and women

Working with clients over 50, one of the more common symptoms I see in both men and women is low libido.

But it doesn’t have to be that way! What can we do to turn from "if we must" to "I can’t wait!".

I'm a registered nutritional therapist and I've got some simple ways to help put the spice back in your life.

The best aphrodisiac foods can be different for men and women

There are a number of factors involved in a downturn in interest in sex and food can make a big difference - however it isn't the same for men and women.

While all of the foods I suggest are healthy and good for both men and women, certain foods can have a more positive effect on either male or female libido.

Any foods which may support good working of the cardiovascular system will also be beneficial for both men and women - improving blood flow and better circulation.

While other foods will help support normal functioning of sex hormones such as testosterone or oestrogen.

The 6 best foods to boost a woman's libido

You might also consider trying these six sexual energy-boosting foods to turn that "not tonight" into why not every night!

1. Broccoli

Try eating this vitamin C-rich vegetable, which has been shown to boost circulation and sex drive.

2. Avocados

Packed with nutritious goodies, including desire-boosting potassium and folic acid, which helps with stamina.

This might make it easier for you to feel “in the mood”. 

3. Eggs

One of nature’s superfoods, bursting with B vitamins, including B6 that helps balance hormones and beat stress – which means you will be more receptive to a fun night in.

4. Dark chocolate

Rich in flavonoids this is also supports good circulation, plus it can stimulate dopamine. This is a hormone and neurotransmitter that affects emotions, behaviour, and movement. It is often referred to as the 'feel-good hormone'.

5. Steak

Women who have a high sex drive often have higher levels of the ‘male’ hormone testosterone.

So, fill up on steak – it’s rich in zinc, known to boost libido by blocking an enzyme that converts testosterone to the ‘female’ hormone oestrogen.

6. Maca

A libido-boosting herb from Peru that is proven to boost sex drive as well as fertility thanks to its high iodine and zinc levels.

Research into maca has also found it can relieve symptoms associated with the perimenopause, including lack of vaginal lubrication and hot flushes.

You can eat maca as a supplement in tablet form or in a powder, which you can add porridge, yoghurt or smoothies. 

Why a woman's libido declines as she gets older

A recent poll reported that nearly half of women in their 50s have continued sexual activity, but that this percentage declined to just 27% in women in their 70s.

Why is this? For women, having sex is often far trickier than just feeling “in the mood”. When we’re have so much happening with family, work, partners and social life, not to mention caring for elderly parents and other demands, sex can often be the last thing we’re thinking about when we finally get into bed.

Couple this with a mixture of lack of body confidence, low self-esteem, stress, ill health, and certain medications, including anti-depressants and blood pressure drugs, it’s no surprise that many of us are really not feeling it. But one of the main reasons that many women lose interest in sex is down to the hormonal changes due to menopause. 

For women going through the perimenopause or transition to menopause, oestrogen levels dip, which may cause our sex drive to dip too. So, it’s not surprising that more than a third of women in perimenopause or menopause report having sexual difficulties, from lack of interest in sex to trouble having an orgasm.

The main culprit is the declining levels of oestrogen, which can reduce our desire to have sex and make sexual arousal more difficult.

Additionally, it doesn’t help that intercourse at this time can often feel uncomfortable or even painful. Plus, any type of surgery or radiotherapy in that area can lead to soreness or pain.

Tips for women who have lost interest in sex

• Speak to your GP about hormones. While hormone replacement therapy or HRT might not be the thing for you, vaginal oestrogen suppositories are targeted and may be beneficial.
• Check your medications. Have a medication review with your doctor to ensure that your medication is not affecting your libido.
• Don’t be afraid to try lubricants. There are some excellent products on the market right now that can make sex more comfortable. The Yes brand is very good.
• Try something new. If your old way of having sex isn’t quite doing it for you right now, mix things up. It might take a little more time, but it’s worth persevering.
• Check in with yourself. How are you feeling? If you’re under a lot of stress or are not feeling well, this will definitely impact your libido. See what you can do to take care of yourself.

The 5 foods to boost a man's libido

And here are some excellent foods for men to try to help increase the va-va-voom.

1. Pomegranate

Eating this delicious fruit can improve your mood, enhance blood flow and raise testosterone levels.

2. Beetroot

Beetroot, as well as spinach, watermelon and pine nuts, are rich in nitrates.

Nitrates help with nitric oxide production which helps with vasodilation and getting the blood pumping.

3. Oily fish

Oily fish, such as salmon, mackerel and sardines, are high in omega-3 fats.

These are anti-inflammatory and great for cardiovascular health. 

4. Oysters

And other shellfish may be a cliché, but it’s for a reason! These foods are rich in zinc, which helps to improve stamina and regulate testosterone.

5. Chilli peppers

A recent study showed that men who ate spicy foods on a regular basis, tend to have higher than average testosterone levels.

This could be due to the flavonoids helping with blood flow, or the endorphins produced from eating it which can get you in the mood!

Why a man's libido declines as he gets older

While it may happen a little later for men, there is generally a decline in libido during their 60s and 70s.

But it can happen earlier, and research shows that temporary decreases in libido can be due to stress or changes in relationships, work or family commitments.

Plus, research shows that chronic conditions in men, such as cardiovascular disease, type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity, and lung conditions, such as COPD, can affect both libido and erectile function.

Declining testosterone levels may be part of the issue. Total testosterone levels fall with age, declining by about 1-2% a year after the age of 30.

Therefore, what is a ‘normal’ range for man of 70 will not be the same as that of someone 30 years younger. However, the standard ranges often don’t take this into account, with the NHS accepting 10 to 30nmol/L as an average.

Tips for men who have lost interest in sex

But it's not just food that can make a difference, if you are struggling there are other things to try to.

• If you feel low testosterone may be an issue for you, speak to your doctor as testosterone replacement therapy (TRT) may be an option.
• Check your medications. Have a talk to your GP, as antidepressants, antipsychotic medications, chemotherapy drugs and blood pressure medications may decrease your libido.
• Watch your alcohol intake, smoking and drug use. Alcohol depresses the central nervous system and reduces sensitivity and can lead to erectile dysfunction. Check in on how much you’re having.
• Improve sleep. Lack of sleep may decrease testosterone production in men, so watch that you are getting your 8 hours a night – and that they are not being disrupted by sleep apnoea or other conditions.
• Increase exercise. Certain types of exercise such as resistance training and HIIT can help increase testosterone levels.
• Check in with yourself. How are you feeling? If you’re under a lot of stress or are not feeling well, this will definitely impact your libido. See what you can do to take care of yourself.